WORDS ARE FUEL FOR EMOTIONS

"Words are fuel for emotions, just as thoughts are". As a matter of fact, "our words give our thoughts verbal expression".

 "Words are containers for power and as such they have a direct effect on our emotions".

 It's bad enough to think something negative but verbalizing negativity makes it even worse. The effect it has on us is inestimable. Oh, how I wish everyone understood the power of their words and by understanding this, they will learn to discipline what comes out of their mouths.
Words fuels good moods and also bad moods; in fact they fuel our attitudes and have a huge impact on our lives and our relationship with one another.

One of the biggest mistakes we make is to think we have no control over how we feel or what we do. God has given us a spirit of discipline and self control, and it is called self-control because God has given unto us this tool to control ourselves. We all have it, but do we use it?  Anything we have but never use becomes dormant and powerless. (proverb 21:23).

 Millions of people live miserable and unfruitful lives because they are deceived, they believe they are merely victims of whatever comes their way. If they wake up feeling depressed, they offer no resistance, but erroneously assume that they must behave the way they feel. I know this because I lived in this kind of deception before.

What we say in difficult times determines how long the difficulty will last and how intense the difficulty will become. I am certainly not saying that we can control everything that happen to us, but we can control how we respond to the things that happen to us by choosing right thoughts and words.

"You can't control the wind but you can control the sails"

SAY POSITIVE THINGS TO YOUR SELF, NO MATTER WHAT YOU ARE PASSING THROUGH IN LIFE......

ALBERT EINSTEIN

The German born physicist was born on the 14th of March, 1879 and he died on 18th of April, 1955. He develop the first of his ground breaking theories while working as a clerk in the Swiss patent office in Bern. After making his name with four scientific articles published in 1905, he went on to win world wide fame for his general theory of relativity and a Nobel prize in 1921 for his explanation of the phenomenon known as the PHOTOELECTRIC EFFECT.  An outspoken pacifist who was publicly identified with the Zionist movement, Einstein emigrated from Germany to the United State when the nazis took power before the world War II. He lived and worked in Princeton, New Jersey, for the rest of his life. Albert was born in the southern German city of ulm and he grew up in a middle class Jewish family in Munich. As a child, Einstein love music (he played the violin),  mathematics and science.

  He dropped out of school in 1894 and moved to Switzerland, where he resumed schooling and later gained admission to the Swiss federal polytechnic Institute in Zurich. In 1896,  he renounced his German citizenship and remained officially stateless before becoming a Swiss citizen in 1901.

While in Zurich polytechnic, he fell in love with his fellow student Mileva Maric but his parent opposed the match.  After finding a position as a clerk at the Swiss patent office in Bern, Einstein married Maric in 1903; he has two children Hans Albert (born 1904) and Edward Albert (born 1910).

In 1921, he won the Nobel prize for his work on the PHOTO ELECTRIC EFFECT,  as his work on RELATIVITY remained controversial at the time.

 In the late 1930's Einstein theories including his equation E=MC2, Helped for the basis of the development of the atomic bomb.

In 1952, Einstein declined an offer extended by David Ben-Gurion, Isreal's premier, to become president of Isreal.

 Though he published an article on the theory in scientific American in 1950, it remained unfinished when he died, of an aortic aneurysm, five years later.....

If Einstein can succeed, nothing is stopping you too except YOUR SELF.........

MANAGE YOUR TIME, MANAGE YOUR LIFE.

"It takes time to succeed because success is merely the natural reward of taking time to do anything well".... Joseph Ross.....

One major characteristic of successful people is effective time management. Successful people don't waste time; they invest time.  Because they are almost always busy, they have learned how to allot their time judiciously to important goals and objectives. Successful people often think of time as a seed that must be sown in the right soil and in the right season to bring about maximum yield. This understanding drives them to relentlessly pursue goals and activities that hold the greatest promise of return on Time invested.

Another characteristics of successful people is that they are miserly with their time. They have little patience and no tolerance for people who waste their time,  and they invest little or no time into objective that are of little or no interest to them.

 In wide contrast, unsuccessful people are very generous, if not thoughtless with their time. They spend most of their time and energy on frivolities and trivialities like endless TV watching, aimless socializing, unprofitable discussion, needless arguments, gossip, etc. One distinctive characteristics of unsuccessful people is a lack of discipline with time. They are poor time managers and for most of them, their best time management philosophy is: what gets interest first gets undivided attention next.  Unsuccessful people rarely consider the potential return on the task or activities they squander their time on.

What about you? How do you use your time? Do you spend your time without consideration? Do you spend major portions of your time on unimportant tasks and activities? Do you give your time and attention to anyone who just asks for it? Do people have access to you whenever, wherever, however and for whatever reasons they may have, either reasonable or unreasonable? Don't ignore these questions because the quality of your life cannot be better than how you use your time. We may all have the same 24 hours each day but we determine our destinies by how we spend our lot.

Your life won't get better unless you spend your time better.

Learn from successful people. Maximize your time, invest your time. Don't kill it. You are only killing your future by so doing! Be prudent, be thoughtful and wise. Not everyone or everything should qualify for your time or attention. Value your time. Cut down TV watching, stop hanging out with people going nowhere with their lives and terminate every form of aimless socializing. Develop positive relationships. Spend time with individuals who are going somewhere with their lives.

Life is not about how many breaths we take but about how many breathtaking moments we experience. Better a short life of significance than a long life of irrelevance. Use your time wisely.

 Effective use of your time will qualify you for an enviable future... YOU DESERVE IT..............

BE A FISH IN WATER

"When you start doing what you really love to do, you will never work another day in your life"

"There is only one success:to be able to spend your life in your own way"

 Have you ever watched a fish swim? I bet you have, and it's likely you were thrilled by its brilliant display of skill and genuity. It's also like you may have been mesmerized by its dexterity, speed and flair. That's how fishes are. They are created to swim and they do so wonderfully and excellently. But what would happen if you took that same fish out of water and placed it on the bare ground? The fish will wriggle and thrash about so wildly that you feel pity for it. Why was the fish adept in one area and inept in the other?  Why was the fish glorious in one place and shameful in the other? What made the difference?
It was the environment. A fish natural environment is water,  and a fish can only excel and flourish in that environment.
 The same principle is true to all living things, every living thing has a particular environment where it can flourish and thrive consistently and almost effortlessly, and when an organism leaves it's natural habitat, it will flounder, fail and even die, just like the fish out of water. An organism cannot live outside of its habitat and thrive.

This principle also applies to human beings. Every one of us has a particular area where we can do very well and succeed in. None of us can do everything or be everything. There's a right and wrong environment for each of us. A person's best will come alive when he/she is correctly positioned. Research has shown that successful people are individuals who have discovered their area of strength. They love what they do, do it well, enjoy it passionately and prosper at it exceedingly. They are like a fish in water and as a result, they excel in what they do.

Follow your heart. Go in the direction of your natural inclinations.  Build your life around your God-given strengths and endowments, for that is where you will find true success and fulfilment.

Don't make money your motivation: make your passion your motivation and the money will follow. Ignorant people may mock you or ridicule you for doing so, but be rest assured that you will find success and fulfilment on that path.

YOU ARE MEANT FOR THE TOP....

THE RULES OF LIFE

THE RULES OF FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

If you imagine or see yourself as the center of your own universe, then you are very wrong.

You have alot and even millions of circle around you. You have the circle of your lover, your partner, this is the closest, most intimate relationship.
The next circle to that is your family and friends. These are people you love the most, you spend most of your time with, they love you the way you are (myself for example, I really don't like visiting people but I have a very good friend that always come visiting and he love me the way I am and never allow my weakness affect him),  that is what we call true friendship! these are the kind of people am taking about, friends that just love you unconditionally, they love you for the real you; these are the people you can relax with, kick off your shoes and be yourself with.  But truly, no matter how sweet these relationships can be, there are still rules, there are right ways to treat them and not-so right ways.
 No matter how close you are, you still have to behave with honour, Dignity and respect. 
Here are some rules guiding friends and families relationship....

1. ALWAYS SHOW THEM THAT YOU APPRECIATE AND VALUE THEM: No matter the closeness of the relationship, always know that little appreciation shows how much you value their RELATIONSHIP with you. Many relationship have gone sour today because of not showing appreciation to each other, many takes the closeness they are having with the person for granted and a single thank you or encouraging word goes a long way.  If we want our relationships with our friends and family to be successful and for them to think the very best of us, then we need to show them that we value them.  By consciously being aware of what we are doing we can improve our relationships, iron out our problems, encourage each other and generally spread a bit of warmth and happiness among ourselves as we go.

2. IF YOU ARE GOING TO BE A FRIEND, BE A GOOD FRIEND: "The most important bit is been there all the time and not just for the good times alone".
Been a real friend is a tremendous responsibility. You have to be loyal, honest, sincere, reliable, dependable, pleasant, open, responsive, welcoming and gracious. You also have to be forgiving at all times, be prepared to offer help, support and sympathy where needed.  And you may have to be brutally candid at times and be prepared to risk the friendship by being so. Yet equally there are times you need to hold your tongue and keep your opinion to yourself. They are your friends, not clones of you. They do things differently.
You have to be counselor, confessor, priest, helper, companion, friend, confidant(e)  and comrade. You have to offer the relationship enthusiasm, dedication, determination, creativity, interest, passion and drive.  I guess if there's anything you should take from this rule is being there for one another. You should be there during the good and bad times.

3. NEVER BE TOO BUSY FOR YOUR LOVED ONES: "The more we put into our relationships, the more we get out of them".

 It's very easy in the rush of living to overlook people close to us. I do it too. I have friends who are very special, very close to me and I forget to phone, forget to stay in touch not because I don't care but because I am too busy.  Unforgivable.  Every now and then I will complain that I haven't heard from them, but of course it is me not staying in touch just as much as it is them.  We have to make time, because if we don't, time slips past so fast that a few weeks become months and then years are added on before we know it.
 Well,  I know I do it even if you don't do it but the more time we put into our relationships with children, siblings, parents and friends the more we get out of them.  It has to be us to make the move, to phone, to stay in touch. And what if they don't also do this? Fine, you are now the rule player, so make time for the people who matter to you today, don't procrastinate!!!

 4. HAVE A GREAT RESPECT AND FORGIVENESS FOR YOUR PARENTS: "Hey, there are lots of areas in our lives where we aren't very efficient or skilled or even enthusiastic".

 Your parents are doing the best they can,  and that might not be good enough for you but it's still the best they could do.  They can't be blamed if they weren't very good at it. We can't be all fabulous parents. We all make choices that others can judge as bad or Unforgivable or just plain selfish and wrong but we aren't them, we don't know what weakness they have or what drive them or what is even going through their head.  We can't just judge untill we too have to make the same choice.
 So, for the fact that they brought you into the world, you owe them that respect and forgiveness. If they did a good job, then tell them,  if you love them, then tell them and if they were appalling at parenting, then forgive them and move on. As their offspring you do have the duty to be respectful; you have a responsibility to treat them kindly and be more than they are by being forgiving and non-judgmental. "You can rise above your upbringing".


YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BRING OUT THE BEST IN THAT RELATIONSHIP..... DO IT NOW BEFORE IT WILL BE TOO LATE

 

THE G.I.F.T TRAITS OF FRIENDSHIP

Every enduring friendship will exhibit these four traits. And while they may vary in degree and consistency with each friend,  they will be an integral part of the devotion that yield true and strong friendships. 

As you know,  nothing good comes without a price. It will be work to be sure, if it were easy,  we'd all have alot of close friends and we would keep the same ones year after year.

To love and be loved,  to understand and be understood, to encourage and to be encouraged by a friend you respect and value is certainly worth the investment.  And when we learn how to nurture our relationship with the four traits,  we invest in a rare treasure indeed -  a friendship anchored by self-sacrificing virtues.


 * TRAIT 1: G -  GIVE ENCOURAGEMENT
 Encouragement always has a positive effect on people, if this weren't true, people wouldn't be so hungry for it. Have you find yourself in a situation where you stop doing something you ought to be doing just because of a statement from someone, that is the power in our words.
When last have you tell a friend or someone, bravo, good work or when last did you sent an encouragement card to someone.
 There is always a price to be paid for discouraging someone. You wound the person's heart and you will fill yours with regret.  Nothing positive comes from discouragement,  it sometimes leads to the death of friendship.

 "Words do have the power of life and death, and discouragement from careless words or neglect is the fastest way to crush a person's spirit and kill a friendship".

Encouragement is inspiring and character building. Don't you find yourself drawn to people who speak kindness to you, people who give you verbal gifts of affirmation and esteem?  We love to be around people who lift us up, it is a natural response to encouragement, just as pulling away or building a Wall is our natural response to discouragement.

 "When you want to speak, think first. Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? If not, let it be left unsaid"

Show a friend how much you appreciate him/her.


* TRAIT 2: I - INVEST TIME
"Proximity proved to be a daunting foe and when you don't stay connected the relationship stop growing ". 
 Just as giving encouragement helps build a stronger friendship, investing time is another significant way to strengthen the ties that bind.  Time investment can come in different forms. Even though your friend lives afar or near, you can keep your friendship alive by following these principles of time investing;
1. You can email each other regularly
2. Call at often time to know whats happening with the other person.
3. Write occasionally. (text messages, letter etc) 4. Visit as funds and schedule allow.
5. Remember each other's birthday and other important dates.

If truely you want your friendship to work out, you have to make these commitments.

"He who plants thorns must never expect to gather roses"


* TRAIT 3: F - FORGIVE COMPLETELY
"Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled note, torn into many parts and burned up, so it can never be shown again"

Giving encouragement and investing time are super effective way to build a strong foundation for friendship. However, if forgiveness is not extended during difficult times,  the relationship will crumble and we will have built the foundation in vain.
 To forgive and forget gives health to the person doing the forgiving, but holding on to a friend's transgressions keeps us from two things;
1. Building a deeper friendship with him/her.
2. Having a peaceful heart which brings health to our body.

Sometimes the only way to get past an offense or hurt from a friend is to discuss it openly together. It's painful and has ended many friendship but occasionally there are issues along the way that must be addressed and understood before you can move on. If you have a friend who value your relationship to risk being vulnerable and tells you that your words have been hurtful (I have a friend like that),  your friendship has the potential to recover and even mature to a deeper level but only on one condition; that you will humble yourself enough to be introspective about your weakness and your ability to make mistakes.
FORGIVE totally, so as not to kiss your friendship good bye.
"Many friendship, long, loyal and self sacrificing rested at first on no thicker foundation than a kind word"


* TRAIT 4: T - TALK LESS, LISTEN MORE
  The best lessons are sometimes the hardest. Asking intentional and unselfish questions, affirming each statement with an appropriate response, unwavering eye contact and above all else, listen much more than you talk.
 Listening is an integral part of every relationship but especially so in friendship.  Skilled conversing shows that you care and helps the person speaking feel important. Often our friends don't need our advice as much as they need us to really listen.
"When you listen to people, you tell them they are important but when you monopolize the conversation, you say you are important"

 Be a friend that listen well and often.......

Let me conclude like this,  seize every opportunity to give encouragement, invest time, forgive completely and talk less.  If we are to know the sweet fruit of intimate friendship, it may sometimes force us out of our comfort zone, but it is God's will for us to love Him and His people.

Remember to treat your friend like a GIFT and this will keep you both connected heart to heart and make you healthier for a long time.

LOOK AT THE CREATOR NOT THE CREATION

You will never discover who you were meant to be if you use another person to find yourself. You will never know what you can do by using what I've done to measure your ability. You will never know why you exist if you use people's existence to measure yours.  All you will see is what the person have done or who the person is.

 If you want to truely know who you are,  look at God. The key to understanding life is in the source of Life, not in the life itself. You are where you are today,  because of the way you see yourself.
What people see or say when they look at you is not all you are, it is only what you have become so far and there is always room for improvement. Your potential is far much greater than what you are right now.  What you will become is much more than what we could ever believe now. You are somebody because you came out of God and he leaked some of Himself into you.

 Don't believe what others says about your greatness, believe what God, (your creator) says about you because He is the one that create and knows you....